IF YOU'VE NEVER HEARD OF THE COUNTESS DI FRASSO...

Then you've never heard of society hostess ELSA MAXWELL!!!

Elsa Maxwell, hostess with the mostest, wrote a fascinating autobiography RSVP: Elsa Maxwell's Own Story in 1953. Naturally, I had to special order this ancient volume from the library, but am I glad I did. This old gas bag recounts (coyly) her life and times. Now these were the most fascinating of times, as La Maxwell managed to be in Europe during those heady days of Cafe Society. This stunning tale recounts lavish parties, evenings with Cole Porter, her complete and utter disinterest in cash, jewelry, clothes, The Duchess of Windsor, booze. No, this Zaftig Zelig (who managed to be EVERYWHERE at just the right time!) never touched so much as a drop, preferring to sing for her supper by playing piano at smart dinner parties. Oh, there's a lot of name dropping to be had here, but it's completely delicious! You see, Europe before and between World Wars was the place to be...and it simply wasn't a place for just anybody, unless, of course you were Salvador Dali, Claire Booth, the lesbian author Janet Flanner (AKA Genet), or some second generation American Heiress looking for a title on the cheap. Oh, what SNOBS Americans are! Simply the WORST in the world!!! Of course she brushes shoulders with John Barrymore, is the FIRST to congratulate FDR on his big White House Win, gives insomniac Winston Churchill advice on his wayward son Randolph, and his fetching bride Pamela Digby, arguably the greatest courtesan of her generation. Oh, that yearly free wardrobe by designer Jean Desse! Olivier of the Paris Ritz, who taught her EVERYTHING she knew about fine food and wine (though she never touched the stuff...err...the wine that is). Of COURSE she knew the fate of Woolworth Heiress Barbara Hutton when she got involved with that horrid Prince Mdivani! She convinced Eisenhower to run for president, and predicted he would win handily, FIVE YEARS BEFORE HAND!!!

Run, walk, sleep with, murder someone if you must, but get your hands on this book!

You won't be able to put it down!!!

ANOTHER MEMORIAL

This makes three in a year. Dear Stewart Allingham. Some other guy whose name escapes me, and now the most painful: AUNT CAROLYN MARYCHILD.

Let me tell you a couple things about Aunt Carolyn. More than a couple. She was the coolest, patchouli smelling, San Francisco dwelling Hippette a youngster could ever have met. Especially one who was just plain weird growing up. When I was really young, she told me that all the chaos in my immediate world was not my fault. She accidentally blabbed that I was adopted (some years later) by my father, which made life a hell of a lot clearer to me. She dated this black guy with an afro and his crazy Irish Setter named Kubla; they drove around in a VW Van, chasing the Grateful Dead hither and yon. She changed her name last name from Curtis to Marychild to honor her Mother, because her father had died before she was born. And she didn't change it, even after she married Uncle Rick. She was, after all, still A Child of Mary. Magdalene. Curtis. I swear.

When I was old enough to travel alone (say, oh, about 8), I'd stay with Aunt Carolyn in her flat on Dolores, near the Haight in San Francisco. I can still smell the musky scent of insensce, marijuana, sex. I remember the odd bits of mysterious Eastern bric-a-brac, the female erotica hanging on the wall, her really cool record collection. The bay windows that wouldn't open. The funky ass fridge with the funky ass shit she ate in it. She took me to the Palace of Fine Arts, the windmill at the edge of Golden Gate Park, The Palace of the Legion of Honor, which became my fave museum of all time.

She took me to see my first Bergman Film, FANNY AND ALEXANDER.

She was the first person to tell me that if I was gay, it was OK.

When I was like, oh, 14, she left me alone for the day, gave me some spending money, put me on a bus and sent me to The Castro. How cool is that? In five years I'd be living there.

She and Rick had been married for a while, I was all grown up, and I'd spend weekends with them in Vacaville, a suburb outside of Sacramento. Now, Uncle Rick was a really cool guy. He had this wicked sense of humour, and a naughty cackle to match. Plus he had the best stash box ever! They took me to a Grateful Dead Show. It was a really warm night, and we were completely stoned (like, who wasn't), though I didn't really dig the music, I got swept up in the atmosphere. Then, like magic, a tangerine moon rose above an open air stage.

Once, tripping HARD on a mix of X and coke in Guerneville, on the Russian River, I called Aunt Carolyn collect and told her I was FAAAAH-REEEEKING OUT! She stayed on the phone with me for what seemed like forever, reminding me that it's only a drug, it will pass through you. Well, it finally did, but all in front of the local Safeway Market, hanging on a pay phone.

Then I got HIV. Then it turned to AIDS. Then I moved to Southern California.

Then we lost contact.

Until recently.

She googled me, and up came this blog.

We emailed. She called me her dear tender-hearted nephew of mine. I told her what she had done to make my life what it is today.

Aunt Carolyn died on June 10th.

I love you Aunt Carolyn.

And don't tell me you can't hear me, because I KNOW you believed...

NETFLIX QUICK PIX!!!

If you think life is bad, watch THIS!!!

WHERE YOU SHOULD BE SHOPPING IN THE LV!!!

By Derek Washington. Recently, I made my way down to my fave shopping destination, The Forum Shops at Ceasars Palace. If you've never been, poor you. It is, hands down, the most luxurious shopping mall in The LV. From it's kitschy talking statues to its cobblestone paths that lead to the worlds premier luxury shops and its ever changing skyscape, The Forum Shops brings a whole new meaning to an afternoon at the mall. Yours truly was invited to the tres chic John Varvatos shop to personally preview the launch of the new Ernst Benz by John Varvatos Limited edition Chronoscope. That's a really cool way to say, majorly nice watch. I was welcomed into the hip, modern space by the killer staff. General Manager Charlotte Moazzami and Assistant Manager Rachel Fox showed me around the shop and introduced me to that aforementioned exquisite timepiece. I was then given the VIP tour by mega well dressed Yoni who pointed out some of the great accessories and the latest Spring Summer 2009 designs. Unlike a lot of high end stores, John Varvatos at The Forum Shops is a welcoming place staffed by friendly folks who delight in showing off their line. The clothes are casually luxurious, perfect for a well dressed guys day or night in The LV. You can go from a private jet straight to your VIP table with a bottle of Dom without missing a beat in John Varvatos. The John Varvatos line is, while stylish and ultra luxe, very comfortable and quite affordable considering the style and quality of work that goes into each piece. If you're a guy looking for a great place to stock up for Spring/Summer 2009, stop in and have the great folks at John Varvatos hook you up in style.